Monthly Archives: May 2011

I’m Spinning With Fire

Saturday night. We had one bottle of wine. No corkscrew. I was determined to open the sucker. I found an ice pick (no luck there). Did some googling and decided I was going to cut the cork into pieces and push them into the bottle. I am sitting there, discussing how get more buzzed off less alcohol. When POP. Wine in my eye. Wine EVERYWHERE. This is what had happened:

Well at least we got to drink the bottle of wine?

Sunday night, Alexandra, Dee and I decided to spend our last night for awhile (ask me why and I will hit you) together. I insisted we eat in front of the “fire place”:

Here we sat from 8pm to 3am, consuming an absolutely absurd quantity of champagne and wine. We literally didn’t get up, unless we needed to get more wine. Until 3am rolled around and the following tweets occurred: “I’m spinning with fire”  “And then we’re sparkling”.
**Do not try this at home. Spinning with fire at 3am, after drinking copious amounts of alcohol is STUPID.**

I had purchased an “unsellable item” earlier in the day. Basically I got carded while trying to buy sparklers at Shaws. Great, I can’t even pass for 18. Anyways, 3am rolled around and I had the brilliant idea to light them. It was raining out, and had been all day. So it was an unusually safe environment. Nothing was going to light on fire. Anyways, I was lighting them off, literally a fistful at a time. Then I decided it would be pretty if I spun around while holding them. Which is when things got stupid (ok, maybe they were already stupid). Try spinning when drinking- but don’t really. It does not end well. I spun, could not catch myself and went spinning straight into a staircase. While holding flames. Sparkling flames. The lit sparklers went flying. We stamped them all out and it was fine. But, WHAT WAS I THINKING?

  

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When blogging involves too much thinking

There once was a time when the second anything ridiculously funny happened, I would think OH I WANT TO BLOG ABOUT THIS. Then I stopped doing school work and well anything that involved any sort of real thinking. Literally- I travel, eat & drink. Even my blogging as petered down to almost nothing. I may or may not have become a waste of space. But I am loving every second of it.

To illustrate my ridiculousness. The other day when I happened to be in Vermont, I stayed up with my friend Kate until almost 4AM crafting. WHO THE EFF DOES THAT? I mean, she was studying, I was writing cards and painting picture frames. Real sense of purpose I have.

Another time, I made this for my friends birthday:

Like, yes I actually built and decorated the whole thing. And then baked 72 cupcakes. No jokes here. (Clearly sometimes we really need to add a picture in here)

Then one time, at like midnight, this group of guys came to our chapter house. Grabbed my hands and kept touching them until all of my lotion was gone, and then proceeded to wrap his arms around me and refuse to let go. Did I mention he was speaking spanish to me the whole time? He randomly showed up with these guys:

who had come an event at our house earlier in the day as a joke. The whole thing was so weird. Yup, I screamed.

Also, when I was a fraternity house which shall remain nameless I met two new people. One was a super hot australian. After refusing to believe he was from Australia (even after I was the one who asked him if he was Australian) I began to tell him all about Sinds and how she was in NZ. I guess someone could have reminded me that NZ and Australia are just not even the same country. I was also given a business card by his friend (hmm). And finally I met someone who knew my name and told me he recognized me from my Facebook profile picture. Please, by all means, someone tell me the socially appropriate way to react to that? Because I HAVE NO IDEA what it is.

*If you’re wondering why neither of us post for months and then all of the sudden we both post… Well I looked at our stats of sorts and it’s a pattern. It’s weird.

**We will be funnier soon. Bare with us.